Women often unprepared to take over family finances

May. 20, 2007 12:00 AM

Jane Kinkel was emotionally drained and financially lost after her 48-year-old husband dropped dead of a heart attack while playing basketball at a family reunion in 2004.

She had little time to grieve, as she instantly became money manager and breadwinner for herself and two of her three children. Kinkel, of Indianola, Iowa, didn't have a job, hadn't run the household finances and was left without a nickel of life insurance.

Today, Kinkel has three part-time jobs and a fresh degree from Simpson College. She is weighing job opportunities in teaching. The 49-year-old isn't flush with cash, but thanks to a can-do spirit and a cousin who served as a financial coach, she is a lot savvier about managing her money.

Women of any age can be struck by the "four Ds:" divorce, desertion, death and disability, said Jean Lown, a professor of family finances at Utah State University.

"Women really need to understand finances, because we have an extremely high likelihood of being on our own," Lown said.

Kinkel didn't know much about her family's finances beyond agreeing with husband Phillip on how much she could spend on groceries every week.

In the early days after his October 2004 death, she said she was afraid to fetch the mail to see which bill would be arriving.

To make matters worse, the youngest of her three children, high school student Jeff, was battling autoimmune disorder. It was so severe he had to be home-schooled and was inside the house 300 days during 2004. Kinkel said she was so consumed with tending to Jeff that money management seemed an afterthought.

To get cash flowing, Kinkel landed three part-time jobs, in banking, retailing and child care. But she still needed an extreme money makeover, and luckily reconnected with a cousin who is a financial counselor.

The cousin, Melodie Whiton, who works for State Farm Insurance Cos., taught Kinkel about budgeting basics, pinching pennies and handling creditors.

"She showed me a lot of possibilities for living well on $12,000," Kinkel said.

Whiton also nominated Kinkel for State Farm's Embrace Life award. The national program recognizes women who have lost a spouse and yet persevered. In 2005, the insurer awarded Kinkel $10,000, which she used to pay bills. "All of the sudden, things weren't quite as scary," she said.

Financial tips to deal with family crisis

May. 20, 2007 12:00 AM
These tips, from financial experts and women who have lost their husbands, will help a woman get up to speed on family finances before disaster strikes or adjust quickly in the aftermath:

• Make a will, and update it to keep up with life's events.

• Get life insurance.

• Diversify your investments.

• If you don't understand money matters, surround yourself with people who do.

• Once a year, have a discussion with your spouse about family financial affairs.

• Get together with like-minded friends once a month to discuss personal finance stories.

• Remember that what you don't know can hurt you.

When a crisis strikes, remember:

• The will. Even if there isn't one, it's crucial to talk with your attorney or financial adviser regarding the deceased's estate.

• Life insurance. Insurers have no way of knowing that someone has died unless they are notified. They'll want to see proof of death. Contact your deceased spouse's employer, too, since they frequently provide group life coverage to staffers.

• Social Security. It's not just for retirement. Survivors' benefits also are available to eligible spouses and minor children. There's a specified time period to file. Contact them at (800) 772-1213 or www.ssa.gov.

• Retirement accounts. You'll want to lay claim to 401(k)s and IRAs, but you'll have to start the paperwork.

• Creditors. It's especially important to contact them if your finances are suddenly impaired.

What's the bright idea?
Mirror-magnified moonlight Lunar-therapy contraption draws crowds
Dennis Wagner
The Arizona Republic
May. 6, 2007 12:00 AM

TUCSON - Carolyn Carter and Michael Prete stand in the desert darkness west of Tucson, smiling beatifically at what resembles a drive-in movie screen covered with mirrors. Their faces are bathed in a blue-tinged light.

After absorbing concentrated moonbeams for two minutes in silence, they yield their place to other people waiting in line.

"It was a very peaceful feeling to be there," says Carter, 68, still beaming.

"A fascinating and strange character of light," adds the 62-year-old Prete.

Over the past year, an increasing number of people have converged on this lonely patch of private land to submit themselves to intense levels of moonlight. The experience is courtesy of Interstellar Light Applications, a Tucson company that has poured $2 million into the belief that there is therapeutic value to lunar rays magnified by mirrors.

On some nights, as many as 120 people show up, arriving from around Arizona and the rest of the country.

Richard Chapin, the inventor, concedes there is no empirical proof of moonlight's beneficial powers because it has never been studied before. He counts himself a pioneer, not a dreamer, using money he earned by founding a Tucson swap meet.

"Interstellar Light Applications is making science fiction into science fact, with the first project of its kind in world history," proclaims the company's Web site. "Only true visionaries see possibilities when others see roadblocks."

Chapin says he invented and bankrolled the moonlight collector with help from astronomers and engineers at Kitt Peak National Observatory, although he says they don't want their names revealed. The contraption stands 5 stories tall and rotates 360 degrees to follow the moon. Its face contains reflectors that swivel to focus on a target that, according to Chapin, could be narrowed to a square millimeter. Such pinpoint accuracy would yield a moonbeam double the brightness of direct sunshine, he says.

Chapin, 54, and his team of helpers, including his wife, Monica, talk about the lunar impact on tides and circadian rhythm. They say moon rays enable "full spectrum light therapy" without the damage caused by sunlight. They envision treatment centers where clients receive moon-glow infusions for cancer, depression and other ailments.

Corinne Davies, who has a Ph.D. in genetics, does not know about moonlight's health benefits. But she is conducting a plant experiment by submitting seeds to 30-minute exposures and measuring any effects.

Davies says folklore about werewolves and lunatics has stifled moonlight study, even though there is a "definite biological precedent for thinking that organisms would have reactions to moonlight."

So far, however, there have been no clinical tests with humans. Chapin's team talks of "unlimited benefits for the medical, agricultural and industrial fields," but their claims are anecdotal, drawn from about 600 people who bathed in concentrated moonshine. Chapin says he knows of no serious side effects.

Mike Cagle, a team member responsible for directing the mirrors, has spent hundreds of hours in front of the reflectors.

"If it's detrimental," he says, "I'll be the first one to grow a second head."

Chapin, who once headed a traveling science museum featuring gee-whiz exhibits, started the moonlight project four years ago when a close friend was dying of pancreatic cancer. He began with the empirical and expanded into the metaphysical.

"I started strictly as science . . . and now I don't mind the spiritual," Chapin says. "Hopefully, it will deepen some people's souls."

The result is a New Age atmosphere at full-moon gatherings in the Sonoran outback, enhanced by music that includes Buddhist chants and an ethereal song titled Sedona Suite.

One veteran moon-bather claims skin tags and moles vanished after previous treatments.

Another, firefighter Jon Graves, says he lost 90 pounds and completed an Ironman race after receiving lunar doses with his bulldog, Gooch.

"It definitely was the kick start, whether it was psychological or not," Graves says.

Visitors receive "moonstones," or rocks purified by sunlight, before they enter the basking zone in twos and threes. They are instructed to soak them with lunar rays for a personally sanctifying energy.

The Chapins don't charge but do accept $10 dona- tions.

Their Web site has a sign-up form for would-be investors. They have established a subsidiary company, Moonlight Infusions LLC, to market items, such as crystals, imbued with moonbeams.

As the moon rises, playing peek-a-boo behind clouds, Chapin's wife, Monica, tells guests to expect wonderful experiences.

"Look directly into that light," she advises. "It's a beautiful light. It's a heavenly light, really."

What do think??

An Angel says, "Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may
happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it
does happen, you have to worry twice."

1. Pray

2. Go to bed on time.

3. Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed.

4. Say No to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will
compromise your mental health.

5. Delegate tasks to capable others.

6. Simplify and unclutter your life.

7. Less is more. (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many.)

8. Allow extra time to do things and to get to places.

9. Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time;
don't lump the hard things all together.

10. Take one day at a time.

11. Separate worries from concerns. If a situation is a concern, find out
what God would have you do and let go of the anxiety. If you can't do
anything about a situation, forget it .

12. Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases.

13. Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried
in the garden, extra stamps, etc.

14. K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an
enormous amount of trouble.

15. Do something for the Kid in You everyday.

16. Carry a Bible with you to read while waiting in line.

17. Get enough rest.

18. Eat right.

19. Get organized so everything has its place.

20. Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of
life.

21. Write down thoughts and inspirations.

22. Every day, find time to be alone.

23. Having problems? Talk to God on the spot. Try to nip small problems in
the bud. Don't wait until it's time to go to bed to try and pray.

24. Make friends with Godly people.

25. Keep a folder of favorite scriptures on hand.

26. Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a
good "Thank you Jesus."

27. Laugh.

28. Laugh some more!

29. Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all.

30. Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can).

31. Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most).

32. Sit on your ego.

33. Talk less; listen more.

34. Slow down.

35. Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe.

36 . Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that
you've never been grateful for before.

My Doctor

He is very good. If you tell him you want a second opinion, he will go out and come in again.

Another time he gave a patient six months to live. At the end of the six months, the patient hadn't
paid his bill, so the doctor gave him another six months.

While he was talking to me his nurse came in and said, "Doctor, there is a man here who thinks he is invisible."
The doctor said, "Tell him I can't see him."

Another time a man came running in the office and yelled, "Doctor, my son just swallowed a roll of film."
The doctor calmly replied, "Let's just wait and see what develops."

I remember one time I told my doctor I had a ringing in my ears.
His advice: Don't answer it.

My doctor sure has his share of nut cases. One said to him, "Doctor, I think I'm a bell."
The doctor gave him some pills and said, "Here, take these if they don't work, Give me a ring."

Another guy told the doctor that he thought he was a deck of cards. The doctor simply said, "Go sit over there. I'll deal with you later."

When I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places, He told me to stop going to those places.

But doctors can be so frustrating. You wait a month and a half for an appointment and he says,
"I wish you had come to me sooner."

HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... Don't waste them on exercise . Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
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Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables . So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
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Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
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Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
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Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
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Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: You're not listening.... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
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Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
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Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable. It's the best feel-good food around!
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Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
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Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape! !
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Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.